Ana Steele is no submissive

Like many other folks, I’ve been reading the commentary by “experts” in the field of women’s rights, psychology, etc. on the trilogy, “Fifty shades of grey.” The consensus is that even though these books hold a very strong appeal for women, they are essentially romanticizing something dark and dangerous, especially for teens and young women. Essentially, the concern is that young women will become attracted to men who are dominant and be more open to the idea of taking a submissive role that leaves them open to exploitation and abuse.

While I don’t disagree with the belief that allowing oneself to be controlled and abused is definitely a bad thing and something we do not want to encourage young women to consider- I do wonder if these experts read the books or if they are just basing their comments on what others are saying about the storyline and characters.

If there is ANYONE out there who hasn’t heard of this trilogy, it is essentially the story of Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele. Christian is fabulously wealthy, handsome, charming and dominant. He doesn’t do the “dating thing,” he has contractual arrangements with women who sign a release and agree to a set of rules in order to have a “relationship” with him. They sleep over but in their own room, they follow strict guidelines for sexual activity that is always what and how Christian says it will be- no questions asked, they dress in clothes he purchases, eat foods he approves and work out with a trainer he chooses three times a week- among other things. If they break any rules, they agree to be punished- when and how Christian wants to do it. It’s more of a contact sport than a relationship.

However, if you actually read the novels, you find out that Ana falls in love with Christian, breaks rules, challenges him and DOESN’T sign the contract at all in the first book- Fifty shades of Grey. The book closes with an impasse and you have to go to book two to see what happens next. Christian is even quoted in “Fifty Shades” as saying; “Ms. Steele, I don’t think you have a submissive bone in your body.” She agrees that she doesn’t think so either. She has constant internal conversations with her ‘inner goddess” and “subconscious;” who tell her she should either go along with Christian in order to be with him or run like hell. She falls in love with him and loves the good things about him- of which there are many. He can be very loving, gentle, funny, kind and protective. That is the Christian she loves and secretly she tries to figure out as she gets more and more information about his past, why he is the way he is. She wants to change him, not be his submissive. Whatever she agrees to, it’s because of how much pleasure she gets from being with him.

This is not about giving and receiving pain- it is about a woman falling for a “bad boy” and hoping to change him. Sounds kind of familiar, doesn’t it. I’m well into the second book and Ana is going past her comfort zone, but still has no desire to be a submissive. She wants the whole thing- and with her, Christian is different then he has ever been with anyone else. From what I understand, things work out for Ana by the end of book three. I intend to read on to find out.

The only danger I see here is that women may believe they can change “bad” guys by loving them enough, standing up to them, understanding and supporting their positive qualities, etc. No one changes unless they want to and make the choice based on something inside of them.

So read the books for sexy fun, cheer Ana on and maybe find some inspiration for your love life. Just don’t take the dominant-submissive stuff too seriously and don’t confuse this fantasy tale with the real thing.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

order diamox pills online sleep aid discount up and up buy eurax cream uk aricept discount buy zyban rid cheap decadron jarabe cheap lipitor vancouver buy viagra super active side effects buy arava 20 mg cholesterol lowering discount peanut butter buy bactroban zalf cheap premarin cream where can i buy saw palmetto for acne cheap glucotrol xl buy xalatan bulk buy cheap generic zithromax cheap clean protein powder order cardizem australia buy propecia london buy famvir online australia exelon discount bulk buy prednisolone tablets 5mg buy asacol brisbane sumycin discount voucher cheap quibron t sr tablets order generic doxycycline online buy viagra professional ko"pa order cardura cheap speman order doxycycline xenia cheap mircette acne buy kamagra soft paypal chloromycetin discount copay buy toradol line cheap coolant buy propecia vallejo order citalopram mg online cheap lopressor buy retin a 0.05 online buy generic xalatan online buy kamagra direct from india buy female viagra gel cheap muscle relaxant quinine order calcium carbonate for dogs etodolac discount vouchers innopran xl discount for tremors order terramycin were order furosemide generic cheap ventolin uk buy cialis lilly buy prilosec xanax order cialis super active testimonials order diclofenac gel zastosowanie buy asacol hd buy zyprexa zydis female viagra discount in uk buy mircette australia buy levlen ed australia cheap elimite lotion order paxil illegal ortho tri cyclen discount dose cheap viagra plus soft tabs order rogaine 5 topical solu"syon buy azulfidine ra buy ortho tri cyclen for acne buy zyvox canada cheap avalide buy kamagra gold discount malaysia nha^.n order mango tu+` ?u+'c buy zofran canada buy dostinex in uk buy lantus glargine insulin order generic provigil online order viagra plus in canada cheap toprol xl withdrawal symptoms cheap cytotec zwaneven cheap urispas uses buy saw palmetto oil uk diclofenac gel discount for solar keratosis buy lithium quartz beads cheap viagra bangkok cheap vytorin india buy unisom sleeptabs buy tadalis sx online kaufen kamagra gold discount citrate buy cipro online men;s health discount recipes alli discount loss pills online pravachol discount cheap rumalaya gel pregnancy buy cardizem bula cheap apcalis sx cialis order abilify reviews cheap nymphomax buy generic propecia uk purim discount alegria nursing shoes cheap buy deltasone wiki cheap cholesterol lower is good zovirax discount get cheap cardizem generic buy zoloft online uk cheap cipro mexico buy brand viagra bangkok order clonidine mail get crestor free cheap actoplus met cost buy zyvox vietnam cheap soft viagra order cialis professional and cialis order aceon batteries citalopram discount vouchers order moduretic notice buy flonase vs buy anti fungal additive for paint hyaluronic acid discount walgreens cholesterol lowering discount tips buy myambutol cheapest place order zofran dosage buy voveran sr india order cleocin gel breastfeeding hydrea discount buy order effexor xr and weight gain order neurontin xanax buy saw palmetto quercetin order glucotrol xl insert mary kay skin care order of application buy neo medrol in the uk cipro xr prices buy propecia from india pain relief discount quick buy aricept online cheap speman himalaya cheap celebrex order levitra from canada buy revia from canada order calcium carbonate or citrate glucophage discount online buy naprosyn online buy cymbalta system cialis soft discount uk buy premarin cream uk buy famvir vegas buy propranolol online buy myambutol order accutane youngstown order coreg side buy cystone online plendil discount code buy propecia toronto buy requip vidal order weight loss laxatives cheap lady era quanto buy female cialis johor bahru buy rogaine 2 lyrics i;d order female viagra name cheap revatio products cheap sinequan tablete cheap penegra medicine buy depo medrol for dogs revatio discount card cheap kamagra oral jelly how to take order minocycline australia rumalaya forte discount himalaya products cheap muscle relaxant gel india viagra professional discount canadian pharmacy arthritis discount licensing buy kamagra oral jelly romania cheap cialis jelly apcalis oral order toprol xl missed dose buy cheap tadalis sx cheap neurontin uses cheap imuran very buy brand levitra order arava india buy clonidine in thailand cheap crestor coupon order viagra sublingual brasil buy tretinoin 0 05 rezeptfrei cheap v gel xcin buy malegra fxt mexico diamox discount price celebrex cost rite aid lopid discount pharmacy buy glucotrol xl splitting order cephalexin uses cleocin gel discount bv cheap chloramphenicol version glucophage discount buy buy rogaine 5 dubai buy isoniazid you buy cholesterol lowering oils buy prilosec rid of gas cheap cymbalta in usa order hair loss questions cheap aspirin wholesale rumalaya forte discount uses mevacor discount vouchers cheap rental pickup trucks buy altace buy tenormin canada buy coumadin side cialis jelly discount kaufen order clomid xanthi buy brand viagra malaysia brand levitra discount coupons cheap zyvox a prescription buy cheap zyban online discount viagra mastercard order antivert reviews order anavar australia order flomax dosage buy zetia kuala lumpur buy nitrofurantoin dosage buy zenegra uk cheap kamagra gold jelly order cardizem use buy januvia real brand cialis discount buy online generic viagra soft tabs uk cheap toprol xl max dose cheap ralista tablets buy clomid australia cheap kamagra oral jelly qatar order cialis super active and cialis buy clomid in mexico order actoplus met manufacturer coupon cheap diclofenac gel grossesse indinavir discount vouchers buy female cialis brand online cheap diovan a prescription buy dulera inhaler cheap effexor xr weight loss buy cipro canada cheap cardura farmaco order ventolin back benicar discount student buy cheap amoxil order cialis super active sale shuddha guggulu discount morpheme buy kamagra oral jelly london buy generic femara order pain relief removal of wisdom teeth cheap levlen pill buy zovirax cold sore cream cheap actoplus met classification hair loss discount medication proventil inhaler discount card buy men;s health look book buy zyvox bulk cheap v gel vrla gel v.s agm cheap brand viagra name in india diclofenac gel discount xedenol buy periactin your body where to buy synthroid in the uk buy glucotrol xl when to take buy deltasone tablets buy orlistat in uk aspirin discount vouchers buy graphic tees online cheap mens health discount belly off buy dipyridamole can you cheap lioresal rezeptfrei order mentax prescription buy albenza online antivert discount vouchers buy cipro quickly order trental online buy female viagra legally online cheap levitra professional paypal order mentax back cialis soft discount gel order hair loss questionnaire law and order actors pay cheap lipitor online buy desyrel gel buy zoloft online usa tinidazole discount vouchers cialis jelly discount erfahrungen buy propecia philippines aceon discount coupon order zantac jarabe cheap cafergot buy order aricept reviews buy dutas place cheap zofran online buy crestor coupon robaxin discount pharmacy cheap diclofenac gel emulgel exelon corporate discounts buy levitra plus bangkok buy kamagra chewable tablets review buy viagra jelly canada online cheap rogaine 2 solution order lipitor buy septilin in singapore liv 52 discount zentel cialis soft discount vantin discounts order apcalis sx ajanta cheap requip a prescription order diflucan dosage buy atorlip 10 side effects buy l tryptophan effects cheap actoplus met and bladder cancer order crestor side cheap bentyl wiki buy amantadine gel cheap cholesterol lowering unclog arteries buy zyrtec online buy innopran xl gsk buy alavert wholesale order singulair legal ortho tri cyclen discount questions order cialis soft originale buy saw palmetto online australia buy bupropion online uk buy terramycin you alesse discount order skelaxin illegal sleep aid discount zolpidem cheap apcalis sx kaufen cheap cleocin gel for acne cheap isoptin nedir skin care order toner buy ventolin inhalers buy propecia dr fox order septilin wikipedia buy terramycin powder uk buy xenical diet pill buy unisom line order flagyl er generic cheap rental key west buy mentats fallout new vegas men;s health discount online buy protonix generic order bactrim buy antivert kong buy asacol 400 mg order diclofenac gel pregnancy benicar discount coupons cheap kamagra oral jelly quoi cordarone discount voucher order cytotec you buy raglan tee singapore cheap glucotrol xl formulation hyaluronic acid discount oral side effects order alphagan notice buy yasmin cheap erexor buy chewable kamagra order glucophage illegal buy cheap dianabol tablets buy pyridium were buy estrace system order female viagra jacks buy confido dosage order naprosyn nedir cheap lisinopril australia buy amantadine in stores order tretinoin 0 05 italok hair loss discount under arms buy premarin job order pravachol canada buy citalopram online in the uk cheap betapace place buy buy rogaine 2 ireland order eurax formula order valtrex dosage buy amantadine pills cheap advair diskus action buy azulfidine cheap order requip uk order claritin buy arimidex liquid buy lamisil pills buy clomid mastercard cheap prevacid solutab environ skin care order online order adalat zaandam buy abilify vancouver lantus insulin discount program buy lasix over the counter order roxithromycin sandoz buy propecia online buy alphagan online cheap januvia a prescription diclofenac gel discount how does it work buy female cialis levitra online cheap viagra plus kamagra oral jelly 100mg citalopram discount order ralista paskaleva buy viagra soft with paypal order mango outlet cheap apcalis sx www.apcalis-sx buy cialis pills plendil discount order rogaine 5 kong buy bystolic online discount brand viagra himalaya cystone buy online erexin v discount opinie forum order unique hoodia cheap ranitidine australia buy female cialis online cheap hytrin ovulos order weight loss breakfast buy ventolin pills online order cialis super active better cheap florinef online viagra professional discount information buy orlistat hong kong cheap lisinopril version order viagra super active uk cheap cleocin gel cheap cholesterol lowering remedies buy viagra jelly zealand online order glucotrol xl splitting cheap levaquin uses cleocin gel discount over the counter levlen discount order glycomet use can you buy clomid at walmart sleep aid discount natural order lamisil safe order hair loss with chemo buy aldactone in nz coreg cr discount coupons cleocin gel discount side effects cialis super active discount hub order buy proscar merck order colchicine dosage buy yasmin online uk buy brand viagra with paypal buy hydrea notice cheap brand viagra the uk buy dutas angeles kamagra best deals buy dramamine in uk buy dipyridamole in thailand buy estrace pills buy alli uk buy anti fungal zetaclear order innopran xl akrimax discount for methotrexate buy anti fungal lozenges cheap rental properties for sale buy carafate japan order erectile dysfunction reasons cheap fast project cars atorlip-5 discount voucher cheap claritin reditabs buy citalopram 20mg uk buy viagra professional vs viagra order bystolic reviews zanaflex discount generic buy toradol uk buy glucotrol xl fiyat? buy myambutol canada order v gel jell order calcium carbonate sulfuric acid buy anavar uk online buy confidor buy propecia in thailand buy dipyridamole in stores buy bupropion sr and weight loss buy penegra online in india celadrin discount program order desyrel india buy men;s health of the fittest buy cipla suhagra order zenegra sk order toradol online buy trental africa etodolac discount generic order tadalis sx reviews cheap cialis super active vs cialis order orlistat order effexor xr used for menopause erexin-v discount buy alli south africa cheap trial erection packs 3 year cheap effexor xr vs zoloft order rosuvastatin illegal ortho tri cyclen discount wiki buy malegra fxt manufacturer buy tricor real lariam discount get pain relief discount hernia buy kamagra oral jelly directions use cheap female cialis online uk buy ephedraxin ingredients order cialis free overnight delivery buy cheap claritin d buy phenergan qtc cheap ralista paskaleva buy cialis via paypal requip discount buy buy cialis jelly australia