Her success can lower his self-esteem

A recent study out of the University of Florida found that a woman’s success made her partner feel worse about himself, even though the men who participated weren’t even aware that their self-esteem had been affected in this way. Not too surprising is that the women in the study were unaffected by their partner’s successes or failures.

The lead author of the study, Kate Ratliff attributed the results to the different ways that men and women respond to competition. Males are more competitive, apparently even with their mates- and this study shines a light on how men perceive their partner’s success as their failure, regardless of whether they were in a direct competition or not. The study also theorized that that the men (from the US and Netherlands) might have been reacting to culturally reinforced expectations of traditional roles in which the male is dominant- and would therefore be threatened by a woman who was elevated by success.

It’s notable that the age of the subjects were college age to 30 years old- yet they still held on to many of the old norms that say the man should take the lead and be the primary earner. This is especially interesting as recent statistics show that 28% of American women now earn more than their husbands. As the roles continue to change and evolve it may be that women will become the ones who are telling the world that “behind every great woman, stands a supportive husband.”

Author: Toni Coleman

Toni Coleman, LCSW, CMC is an internationally recognized dating and relationship expert and founder of http://consum-mate.com Her expertise is sought frequently by local and national publications and top ranked dating and relationship websites and she has been a guest on a number of radio and TV programs. She is the featured relationship coach in “The Business and Practice of Coaching,” (Norton, September 2005); the author of the forward for, “Winning Points with the Woman in Your Life, One Touchdown at a Time;” (Simon and Schuster, November 2005) - and her popular relationship articles can be found in several magazines and a number of self- help, personal growth and dating/relationship websites. Toni holds a Master’s degree in Clinical Social Work, is a licensed psychotherapist in the state of Virginia, and earned a certification in life coaching.

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