Secrets partners keep

The Wall Street Journal’s Market Watch section ran an interesting piece titled “10 things your spouse won’t tell you;” and as a seasoned therapist and couples counselor- I can testify to how right on it is.

What 10 things did they list? Your spouse won’t tell you that:
• They spend more money on their lover than you (if they have one)
• They have a secret bank account (if they do)
• They have strong feelings for their “office spouse” (if this is so)
• They bought something they know you wouldn’t want them to, or they lied about the cost
• How much they earn- they often underestimate the amount more than inflate it
• They like the fact that they make more money than you (if they do)
• They hate being the breadwinner- many women feel this way but don’t tell their spouse
• They married you for money- if money played a big role as it often does, they won’t share this
• Honesty about money means more than fidelity- surveys showed this surprising preference
• They spend a lot on your gift to impress the beautiful saleswoman- men care about what attractive strangers think

The bottom line to this piece is that MONEY MATTERS. Hearts, flowers, chemistry and passion aside- money can make or break your dating. relationship or married life together. Make sure your finances are in order when you set a goal of meeting that right person. Check your credit score and address any issues, pay down credit card balances, school or other loans and work on building up savings. It may be very unromantic, but money matters and it has become a major part of attraction, chemistry and mate selection- for both sexes.

Author: Toni Coleman

Toni Coleman, LCSW, CMC is an internationally recognized dating and relationship expert and founder of http://consum-mate.com Her expertise is sought frequently by local and national publications and top ranked dating and relationship websites and she has been a guest on a number of radio and TV programs. She is the featured relationship coach in “The Business and Practice of Coaching,” (Norton, September 2005); the author of the forward for, “Winning Points with the Woman in Your Life, One Touchdown at a Time;” (Simon and Schuster, November 2005) - and her popular relationship articles can be found in several magazines and a number of self- help, personal growth and dating/relationship websites. Toni holds a Master’s degree in Clinical Social Work, is a licensed psychotherapist in the state of Virginia, and earned a certification in life coaching.

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